TIME TO REVIVE AN OLD "NUTS" FEATURE -- DUDE AND DWEEB OF THE WEEK
Dude(s)
This one's easy. The Pittsburgh Pirates, off to 3-1 start. Brilliant pitching, especially by Snell (6IP 2ER 4H 1BB 11So). Nice walk off HR by Jason Bay. Good job by Bautista filling in for Sanchez. So, the Buccos beat Nancy Pelosi (Middle-East peace mission) by a country mile.
Dweeb(s)
Again, easy. John McCrazy and Lindsay Graham. Nice job proving that "we're" winning the war in Iraq by going shopping surrounded by 100 Special Ops dudes, with 5 Blackhawks in the air. Lindsay better watch his (light) step. The rumors are all over the place and he sounded every bit the 8th Avenue Runway Boy in his description of his shopping for rugs. South Carolina doesn't seem to like its queers all that much. Iris Tennenbaum or any straight Democratic man, is going to take your Senate seat from you, you sweet thing.
We're also winning the war on poverty in the U.S.A. and Kelso will prove it. He go shopping for malt liquor in a suit and tie at midnight in Camden, NJ, surrounded by 100 Special Ops dudes, with 5 Blackhawks in the air. Game, set & match. There's no poverty in the U.S.A. Whaddya know?
Kelso's fortunes now rest on the narrow shoulders of Jim Furyk. Go on, my son.
Kelso's Nuts love you.
2 comments:
Also Graham said he bought five rugs for $5. Did these sellers forget how to haggle, or was someone pointing a gun at them from offstage somewhere? By the way, so deep is Graham's corruption that he would accept the 5 rugs for $5 not even considering, or aware but simply able to ignore, that he was exploiting some poor bastard who risks his life every day to work in a market and feed his family. The only legit reason a guy would accept $5 for 5 rugs is that the dollar/dinar rate is blowing out as a result of the war. Now this is a big issue, as one of the key economic objectives the US had in Iraq was introducing the new dinar and stabilizing it. In fact I was going to buy some dinars -- you can get them on ebay from exchange traders in Jordan -- and put them away. The only problem is you had to have physical dinars (forget custody), and at the rate then prevailing I would've had to take delivery of gigantic DHL bags full of money, and store them somewhere. Now I'm glad I didn't, given 5 rugs going for $5.
Also did better with the Iceland Krona bond, and thanks Kelso for that one.
Thanks, Harvey. As usual, we do the best we can with the limited tools we have.
Don't think Graham needed any Special Ops thugs to point the gun at Omar The Rug Maker to get his deal. Lindsay's from South Carolina; his expertise in exploiting textile workers is about the equivalent of yours at 1970s-style NYC stoop-ball.
The Dinar may well be the ONLY world currency weaker than the USD. You'll find the technological analog in cellphone service. The US has the WORST cellphone infrastructure and tech of any country on earth. Haiti's is probably better. Why? Because 3G and 4G service has encryption as a matter of course. Given the original exclusion of cell calls even pre-9/11 from state and federal wiretap rules (limited court order, 14 day periods, everything unrelated to investigation excluded, violations of which render all evidence inadmissable), with PATRIOT2, you'll have 3G around the time you have your first Native American Woman astronaut leading a mission to Neptune.
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